13th Gate and The Pastime Lounge
Downtown

People who complain that there is nothing good to do in Baton Rouge must be forgetting about the
13th Gate. It is consistently ranked as one of the best haunted houses in the U.S. Dwayne Sanburn
has made some improvements this year, and the cheesier items have been 86ed from the tour. Also,
tickets are now available online. http://www.midnightproduction.com/the13thgate.htm

Even though DBG’s Protector sometimes used her as a human shield, she still enjoyed wandering
through the forest of fog and crawling out of the crematorium. She later suggested that they attend
one of the special “flashlight nights” which occur after Halloween. DBG’s Protector politely declined
this invitation.

Before you cross over to the dark side, DBG suggests stopping for a drink at the Pastime Lounge.
Masochists will enjoy being demeaned and mistreated by the surly harpy behind the bar. DBG would
love to see a death match between her and the demon spawn who waits tables at Fleur de Lis Pizza.
As nicotine courses though their crusty veins, they each pull at the other’s over-processed hair. In the
end, they find happiness together and settle into a spinster lifestyle much like Marge Simpson’s
sisters, Patty and Selma.

If your evening of harpies, ghouls and goblins hasn’t frightened you enough, walk up the levee to the
Belle of Baton Rouge. Watching little old ladies blow their Social Security checks on the nickel slots
will definitely keep you up at night.

cherrythedivebargirl@gmail.com

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